middle aged sunglass type

you know, i should really come to terms with the fact that i'm a middle aged man. jesus, i put on 17 pounds this year. all in the gut. i've got the body of an ethiopian. "slender but flabby" to quote vince vaughn.
yes, i'm a middle aged man. a middle aged deli clerk. been one for 17 years! no major accomplishments under my belt. i got a letter from RCA records once asking for a demo tape i had made. sent it in. never heard back from them. you know who records for RCA? beats me, but i'm betting there aren't any deli clerks on their roster.
so, i'm a slowly expanding, slightly graying, average as average can be, middle aged deli clerk. paints quite a picture, eh?

so how come i still feel so superior to all...of...you.

-the feeb

p.s. pssssst (whispered) not you...but you know who.